Friday, November 16, 2012

She says...

"what do you think of guys that go find prostitute?"
One day, one of my girl friend asked me this question. I was taken aback for awhile while thinking of how I would react if it happens to me though I kinda have this kind of experience before.

Years back, one of my ex-boyfriend told me or confessed to me that he did went prostitution before even he's in the relationship with me. He told me that after we broke up. I was damn furious inside but I tried to act cool as if it doesn't matter anymore since we broken up. I still can ask him tons of questions because I'm curious and angry at the same time like I'm just his friend. Then months later we got back together after knowing what he have done. What was I thinking then? is blind?Haha. But in the end, our relationship didn't last for more than 2 years if I'm not mistaken.

I moved on, met a lot of people, old and young, experienced and inexperienced, some were old but still act like a kid...different different types of people,different cultures, different mentality, different exposures and so much more. Sometimes when I think back, I realized its quite interesting and funny at times. Of course I learned from experiences, some were life stories from others, some from newspaper/magazine articles, blogs, facebook and etc.

After all these while changed how I used to think. I sort of perceived myself that all men do have the possibilities to go for prostitution or cheat or just flirts unless you are lucky enough to find one that doesn't. What can you do to stop men from all these temptation? Lock them up? Cut their kukuciao off? *this is exactly what I asked my friend* Hehe.. Then my friend told me 'sometimes she rather be single to avoid all these from happening'. So I told her, 'what if all the men in the world cheats or go for prostitute? Are you gonna be single forever? And do you think being a lesbian by force will change anything?' The answer is NO. You will probably end up in cheating your lesbian partner with another guy instead. No matter how hurt you are, with all the dramas of fighting, wanna kill yourself or wanna kill him or that bitch, it will only stop him if he dies, or else he would apologize and just hide it from you in a smarter way so you won't find out the next time. Or he will probably just leave you or if he love you enough probably he will change. Who knows. But really...what can you do to stop all these? Yes, you can choose to leave him but think again, how many times you wanna leave your relationship after years of building it up? Asking that question myself..I really don't know.

I've seen wives who can act like nothing happened although they are hurting inside yet they never leave their husband who cheats, some even accept the mistress or girlfriend or second wife if you wanna call it. But luckily their husband are wealthy, they can go shopping, pamper themselves with their husband's money and some even get a toy boy themselves.

Of course it's easier said than done although I'm being quite positive right now but definitely, for sure I'll get furious and upset, I'll probably go nuts as well, like how my girl friend told me. I'll probably get mad and whack the hell of out him but except for myself to feel better what can I change? I can't change what has happened, it's either I leave him or I'll have to accept fate and keep hoping and praying that he will change or should I just act stupid or just don't care about him and make him feel guilty.Hmmm......


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